The Real Power of Networking in Nigeria: Not All Connections Are Equal

           In Nigeria, networking or “connection” is everything. From landing a job, securing a government contract, getting out of police trouble, or getting into university—you often hear people say, “I get person for there.” Networking is deeply woven into the culture. But here’s what many Nigerians don’t realize: not all connections are created equal.

There are high-quality connections—built on skill, mutual value, goal alignment, and purpose—and there are low-quality connections, often rooted in sentiment, proximity, familiarity, or survival. Understanding the difference is the first step in building a network that actually adds value to your life, takes you to the next level and brings success.

1. High-Quality Networks: Skill + Value + Shared Vision

       These are intentional relationships, not just acquaintances or people you know. In Nigeria, the misconception is that “having a rich uncle” or “knowing someone at the top” is enough. But true high-quality networks are based on contribution, not convenience.

These are the kind of connections that help you grow. People in high-quality networks don’t just know each other—they bring something to the table. These connections are based on:

Shared goals (e.g. business growth, innovation, learning).

Unspoken Standards: You can’t be lazy or entitled. If you’re not learning, growing, or improving, you’re out of alignment with the group.

Mutual benefit: each person brings something the other needs. Skills, resources, contacts, insights. If you’re not bringing value, you’ll not be taken seriously or left behind . In these circles, you earn your space.

Elevated environments (masterminds, seminars, investor circles, industry events). The topics aren’t gossip or daily complaints—they’re strategy, investments, impact, and innovation.

         These networks build each other, create opportunities, offer honest feedback, and introduce new doors to growth. But they are also earned. You don’t get into a high-quality circle by just “being around”, “knowing someone” or calling someone “bro.”

You need to bring value, show capacity, and prove your mindset is aligned with growth. If you’re not growing, you’re not staying.

Examples: Chidi is a broke digital marketer. Amaka is a fashion designer with money but no online sales.

Chidi offers to grow her brand for a share of profits. He runs ads, boosts her online presence—sales explode. She earns more, he gets paid. 

  Together they become a power house by adding value to each other and growing together. In other words, they Both win.

2. Low-Quality Networks: Familiarity Over Function

        Many Nigerians are loyal to people who are emotionally valuable but professionally irrelevant. They don’t leave these networks because they’ve “suffered together.” But shared suffering doesn’t mean shared success. This common network in Nigeria is built on:

Time spent together (childhood friends, schoolmates, ex-colleagues).

Loyalty and sentiment (“he’s my guy”, “she was there for me”).

          While these relationships can be emotionally fulfilling, they often lack strategic value. They are not pushing you forward, they are simply keeping you company. Worse, they can unknowingly drag you down if you begin to outgrow their level and they can’t (or won’t) grow with you.

You may find yourself unable to grow a business, change careers, or elevate your income because you’re stuck in circles that validate old thinking, celebrate thinking small, and frown on dreaming big.

Example: Tunde has no money, no skills, and no plan to grow. His friend, Dami, just started a tech business. He’s learning, struggling, and reinvesting every kobo.

Tunde keeps asking for money but offers nothing in return. No help, no support, just constant demands. Dami tries to help but gets drained financially and emotionally.

Eventually, Dami’s business crashes under the pressure. Tunde’s still broke. Dami’s now broke too.

One was a parasite. The other tried to carry dead weight. In the end, they Both lost.

        These networks can quietly kill your momentum if you don’t outgrow them. Familiarity becomes a prison.

Relevant vs. Irrelevant Connections

       Connections are not forever. They have seasons. Someone relevant to you five years ago may not be today. The quality of a connection isn’t just about who the person is—it’s about what role they play in your current season.

A connection Is relevant when it aligns with where you’re going, not just where you’ve been. A connection becomes irrelevant when the values, goals, and conversations no longer match your path, where you want to be—even if they’re loyal, kind, or helpful in the past.

Every time your goals shift, your network must be reviewed. If they don’t match your level of ambition, your dreams will shrink to fit their comfort. It’s not disrespect to reposition or outgrow certain relationships—it’s reality. If you don’t update your circle as your goals evolve, you will be limited to the level of thinking and exposure around you.

It’s not about cutting people off emotionally—it’s about placing them where they belong in your life.

Why Most People Stay Stuck in Low-Quality Networks

      Staying connected out of guilt, not growth. People stay loyal to the people that limit them because they don’t want to offend anyone. But offending your future to please your past is not loyalty—it’s self-sabotage. 

Fear of judgment – “They’ll say I’ve changed.”, “Now you don make am, you no dey pick call again?”

Survivor’s guilt – “We all struggled together, I can’t leave them.”

Sentimental loyalty – “He helped me in school, I owe him.”

        Elevation is personal first before it becomes communal. Growth must not be collective. Emotional loyalty to networks that can’t match your vision is emotional sabotage. You can love people from a new level, but you don’t have to shrink to stay close to them.

How to Upgrade Your Network Strategically

       Now that you know the problem, here’s how to do better—intentionally:

1. Audit your current network: Who in your circle is still relevant to your growth?

Ask:

Who here adds to my growth?

Who holds me accountable for my success?

Who still fits where I’m headed?

2. Seek value-driven spaces: Join professional groups, attend events, invest in mentorship.

3. Give value before asking for it: Show you belong in higher circles by the value you offer.

Share knowledge

Help people solve problems

Add something—time, ideas, effort—before expecting help

Don’t just network. Be someone worth networking with.

4. Don’t just collect contacts, build relationships: Follow up, contribute, support.

5. Keep Evolving So Your Network Has to:

Read books and stay sharp

Master your skill

Build something credible

Challenge your own thinking

6. Let go of connections that anchor you:

 If it no longer serves your journey, it’s okay to leave. Some connections must be left behind. Others can be demoted—still love them, just not in your decision-making circle. Make peace with outgrowing people—it’s a sign of maturity, not arrogance.

         The people you consistently spend time with reflect your level of thinking, goals, and how your future would look like. In Nigeria, where relationships often override merit, it’s easy to think any connection is better than none.

But the wrong connections don’t just waste your time—they waste your potential. Who you sabi must match who you are becoming.

To grow, your circle must grow. As your mindset evolves, so must your relationships. Don’t just be connected—be connected to the right people. That’s how you turn connection into capacity.

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